Cultivating healthy attitudes towards relationships and marriage (Part 2)

Credit: Photo by Ethan Robertson on Unsplash

(continued from Cultivating healthy attitudes towards relationships and marriage – Part 1: https://wordpress.com/post/mattersoftheheartrelationshipclassesforsinglesmarriedcouples.wordpress.com/355)

In love there are no stereotypes. Sometimes you might need to break gender conventions in order to refresh your partner. This is important for married couples, especially when the other party needs help with their responsibilities or just coping with the daily drudgery of life. Adopting a rigid stance and defending that stance with statements such as ‘ I’m a man, I can’t do the dishes’ (when your wife is visibly tired) or ‘I’m a woman, I can’t surprise my man by taking him out on a shopping date’, (when he appears stressed up), does no good for the health or success of the marriage in the long run.

Points to consider (for married couples):

1. Observe your loved one’s reactions when they are tired or stressed. If their pattern of unease is becoming consistent and they appear edgy, aggressive or unresponsive towards you, it is time to step in and lend a helping hand in order to ease their discomfort and pressure.
2. When the level of attraction towards your loved one begins to wane, it is time to change gear and the pace of things between both of you.

It is unrealistic for a relationship/marriage partner to think that the relationship/marriage itself contains the magic. On the contrary, it is the people and the efforts they make in that union that make the difference and ultimately the magic of that relationship or marriage. Therefore, what keeps a relationship/ marriage fresh and re-invigorating is the level of ingenuity and creativity relationship/marriage partners bring to their union. This means relationship/ marriage partners cannot afford to be complacent and leave their relationship/marriage to chance. There is the need to be intentional in order to make a relationship/marriage work as it is also subject like everything on earth to the law of harvest.

Points to consider:

1. Introduce the element of spontaneity into your relationship/marriage – Go out of your way to do sweet, nice and thoughtful things for each other from time to time.
2. Outdo each other in your demonstration of love for each other because as you do, the relationship or marriage remains strong, fresh and interesting.
3. Guard against complacency – it is very easy to get into a blind routine which sometimes leads to a rut and stagnation in the relationship/marriage.

Thought to steer by:

Till the ground and the ground will be tilled. Ignore it and thorns and thistles will grow out and cause an inconvenience for you. Don’t be like the student who makes no effort to read and expects to ace an A grade in the exams – failure is inevitable for such a student.